Domestic Monastery
Author: Ronald Rolheiser
Date: 2019
Publisher: Darton, Longman and Todd
ISBN: 978-0-232-53412-2
pp. 89 pbk
I
must begin this review with a confession. I received this book just before
Christmas, read it on a grey misty day, made some notes for review and then put
it aside. The Christmas festivities and work demands took up my attention from
there and then the covid crisis hit… In many ways this has proved providential.
For if Fr Rolheiser’s new book was relevant BC (Before Covid), well it is
essential reading PC (Post Covid). His premise is simple, but in writing on
spirituality it is more often than not that simplicity hits the spot.
Essentially he hopes to persuade us that ‘monasticism’, ‘silent retreat’ and ‘spiritual
seclusion’ are not just for a cloistered elite but are not only accessible, but
even essential for all, especially those engaged in busy family and work lives.
To this end he weaves a short punchy text that is rather charmingly illustrated
with old woodblock drawings and etchings (no credits or references given,
alas). Those familiar with Fr Rolheiser’s style already – straightforward and
honest spiritual reflections founded on good learning and often delivering a
punch at the end – will not be disappointed. The text, though not long, has a
clean symmetry and structure which make it something to return to again and
again. Within are so many spiritual themes that it is invidious to pick out
examples. However to illustrate Fr Rolheiser’s argument I shall do just that.
The first of these, quoting St John of the Cross (one of his favourite
inspirations), is that the contemplative life is not based on abnegation and
denial but, rather, a mixture of withdrawal from the world and the cultivation
of tenderness and mildness: ‘withdraw from the world and become mild, bringing
the mild into harmony with the mild’ (p.11). Giving us numerous examples he
shows how this ‘milding’ is just as likely (if not more likely) to be achieved
by a busy mother as a spartan recluse. His second point, that great spiritual
progress can be achieved by ‘staying in our cell’ doesn’t need to be reiterated
PC. If we have learnt one thing over the past few months it has been the need
to live with, and face, our lives, warts and all, as we work out our own
socially isolated covid seclusion. Which draws us to Fr Rolheiser’s third
point: the need in the spiritual life for rhythm, routine and ritual. How many
of us, I wonder, have resorted to routine and ritual these past few months to
get us through the sheer mechanics of surviving the covid lock-down? As he
reminds us: ‘monks sustain themselves in prayer not through feeling, variety or
creativity, but through ritual, rhythm and routine’ (p.42). Prayer, for Fr
Rolheiser is ‘a relationship, a long term one and lives by those rules’ (p.43).
Pointing out the necessary tension that lies between contemplation and action
(as well as that between ‘passion and purity, intellect and will, community and
individuality’, p.55) Fr Rolheiser shows us the ‘creative tension’ that lies in
the path of those who seek a ‘Domestic Monastery’. One last point. I
particularly enjoyed Fr Rolheiser’s exposition of the spirituality at different
stages of life as he clearly and unflinchingly stresses the need in our final
years ‘to not so much struggle as to how to give our lives away but with how to
give our deaths away’ (p.69). Strong stuff but, again, so appropriate to our
mortality haunted times. So, in conclusion, I would not only recommend you buy
a copy of this small spiritual classic but that you purchase one as a gift for
those friends, colleagues, loved ones and family members who have struggled
these past few months to make sense of the impact of the deadly covid virus.
This charming little book will, I am sure, bring a lot of healing to a traumatised
world. Thank you Fr Rolheiser.
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